Skip to main content

Turning 25 and the Changes that Came Along With It!



So, in January I turned 25 but with 25 came a lot of changes in my life and inside of myself. I decided that it was time to take a break from school after going for what feels like forever. I began to change my outlook on careers, relationships, kids, material things, everything honestly.  I began to realize that there are so many things in this world that don't have to be absolutes. A friend of mine asked me who I was 5 years ago and it got me thinking about how much I have changed and how much I have grown. "Who was I five years ago?" Well, there were 3 things that came to mind, these 3 things that I was so sure I wanted.

1. I wanted to get married.
2. I wanted to be a mom.
3. I wanted to be a teacher.

Pretty common things, I think. Things I was sure I would never waiver on, so sure that I would tell anyone who asked me. This is what I want and this is what I intend on achieving. 5 years ago,  I was on my way, and I sit here today years later, having achieved none of them. (Albeit, number 3 is close and definitely not off the table.)  That last sentence sounds kind of sad, "having achieved none of them" however, to be completely honest, I don't think I was ever meant to achieve them by this point in my life.  My outlook on life is different, I want different things, I want to fall in love over and over, I want to read 50 books in one year, I want to cliff dive, I want to teach English in a different country, I want to help build houses in Thailand, I want to attend Mardi Gras with my friends, I want to ride an elephant, I want to be able to fit all of my clothes into one suitcase. I want to see the world. I want to experience the world. I want to die with memories and stories, not things.

I feel as though, I was so conditioned to want certain things that I forgot there was an entire world out there that I have never seen. From the youngest age, I remember thinking "that is what you do, find someone you love, marry them and then have kids."  It really seemed simple. But it isn't and I do believe that there are instances where people settle; people who don't love each other are together, people have children with someone that they don't want to be connected with forever and people stay at jobs they despise because they don't think they have another option. I understand that there are absolutely some exceptions to all of these things. Woman saying that they may not want children is becoming more common but still scoffed at by most. Woman who say they don't want to get married or have an monogamous relationship mostly just get head shakes of disappointment. I have just decided that I don't ever want to settle, not on anything. I never want to limit my life because what I want isn't socially acceptable. If I  find that one person that I truly can see myself not wanting to kill eventually, maybe I will get married, however maybe I won't and I truly don't believe that there is anything wrong with that. Marriage and relationships are not something that my world revolves around, seeing as how  I am never in a relationship, I am sure you could have guessed that. ;)  Will I have children? Maybe. We will see, but I will never put that in an absolute because selfishly, I want to lead a life that I love, a life that is filled with adventure and never a single regret and maybe kids don't fit into that and THAT IS OK.



5 years ago, I was CERTAIN that I wanted these 3 things and now, to be completely honest, I am not sure I want any of them.  I love, love but I don't think that everyone is meant to be with one person for the rest of their lives. I LOVE children, but not everyone is meant to have them.

3 Things I want now:

1. Live a life I LOVE
2. See the world
3. NEVER, ever let someone else make me feel like my choices are the wrong ones.


My wants have changed, a lot over the last little while and I think everyone's do. It is natural and I think it is why the whole "mid life crisis" is so common haha.

Anyways, I know I haven't written in awhile but this is where my minds been at!

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

My Very Own Eulogy and Obituary.

This may be a morbid one! I had to write my own eulogy and obituary for a class! Enjoy! Obituary: Shelby Robyn Collett, 23, of Calgary, Alberta passed away on November 12, 2015 after fighting a very long and hard battle. She was born on January 25, 1992 in Drumheller, Alberta, she was the only daughter of Ralph Collett and Yvonne Comstock. She graduated from Strathmore High School in 2010 and was in the middle of completing her teaching degree at Mount Royal University. Shelby is survived by her parents, her grandparents, George and Jewel Comstock, her sister Paige Severtson (Brad), her brother Casey Collett (Pam) and her nieces and nephews, Dayne, Kali, Carson, Grady and Lila. Along with numerous special aunts, uncles, cousins and friends.  A celebration of Shelby's life will be held in Hussar, Alberta on November 17, 2015 and Shelby made a request that bright colours are to be worn as well as that in lieu of flowers please make donations to a charity of your choice. ...
Post a Comment
Read more

My Biggest Fears.

So, I was having a tough time coming up with ideas for my blog and my sister sent me a few ideas that I could use and one of them was phobias, so that made me think about everything and it made me realize that I have a few fears in my life that really really scare me. Also, I am gonna try and get pictures for this blog as well.... but it will freak me out so I hope you realize what I am going through lol.  I will start with the least and end with the biggest fear! Here we go! =) 3. Clowns. OMG. Please do not laugh because I am not kidding. I am petrified of clowns. I have no idea why but they scare the shit of out me. I have this fear that I am going to be locked in a carnival or something and the only things around are clowns. I remember one year we went to Screamfest and there was a clown walking around and I looked at it and thought to myself... he is gonna come up to me I know it. Well what do you know, as we are waiting in line he comes up behind me and whispers in my ear...
Post a Comment
Read more

So, I wrote a book.

What is new in my life?  Well not a whole lot actually,  still going to school,  still have the same friends,  still worrying about everything,  still dealing with anxiety.  Isn't that just the life?  I suppose.  It is mine at least lol. So, I feel like I have spent a lot of my time trying to find my "thing."  I always wanted to be that person who had one thing they were known for.  So I've tried it all,  I draw,  which is fun but I don't find myself constantly doing it and if I decide to do it as gift it seems like more of an effort than something I just enjoy.  I tried scrapbooking... Nope.  I tried running,  nah.  Then baking,  which I actually do love!  But somehow in the midst of looking for my "thing"  I never even realized that I had already found mine and I'd had it for a long time and it had always been my outlet, it had just been something that was always private and I never really...
Post a Comment
Read more