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Turning 25 and the Changes that Came Along With It!



So, in January I turned 25 but with 25 came a lot of changes in my life and inside of myself. I decided that it was time to take a break from school after going for what feels like forever. I began to change my outlook on careers, relationships, kids, material things, everything honestly.  I began to realize that there are so many things in this world that don't have to be absolutes. A friend of mine asked me who I was 5 years ago and it got me thinking about how much I have changed and how much I have grown. "Who was I five years ago?" Well, there were 3 things that came to mind, these 3 things that I was so sure I wanted.

1. I wanted to get married.
2. I wanted to be a mom.
3. I wanted to be a teacher.

Pretty common things, I think. Things I was sure I would never waiver on, so sure that I would tell anyone who asked me. This is what I want and this is what I intend on achieving. 5 years ago,  I was on my way, and I sit here today years later, having achieved none of them. (Albeit, number 3 is close and definitely not off the table.)  That last sentence sounds kind of sad, "having achieved none of them" however, to be completely honest, I don't think I was ever meant to achieve them by this point in my life.  My outlook on life is different, I want different things, I want to fall in love over and over, I want to read 50 books in one year, I want to cliff dive, I want to teach English in a different country, I want to help build houses in Thailand, I want to attend Mardi Gras with my friends, I want to ride an elephant, I want to be able to fit all of my clothes into one suitcase. I want to see the world. I want to experience the world. I want to die with memories and stories, not things.

I feel as though, I was so conditioned to want certain things that I forgot there was an entire world out there that I have never seen. From the youngest age, I remember thinking "that is what you do, find someone you love, marry them and then have kids."  It really seemed simple. But it isn't and I do believe that there are instances where people settle; people who don't love each other are together, people have children with someone that they don't want to be connected with forever and people stay at jobs they despise because they don't think they have another option. I understand that there are absolutely some exceptions to all of these things. Woman saying that they may not want children is becoming more common but still scoffed at by most. Woman who say they don't want to get married or have an monogamous relationship mostly just get head shakes of disappointment. I have just decided that I don't ever want to settle, not on anything. I never want to limit my life because what I want isn't socially acceptable. If I  find that one person that I truly can see myself not wanting to kill eventually, maybe I will get married, however maybe I won't and I truly don't believe that there is anything wrong with that. Marriage and relationships are not something that my world revolves around, seeing as how  I am never in a relationship, I am sure you could have guessed that. ;)  Will I have children? Maybe. We will see, but I will never put that in an absolute because selfishly, I want to lead a life that I love, a life that is filled with adventure and never a single regret and maybe kids don't fit into that and THAT IS OK.



5 years ago, I was CERTAIN that I wanted these 3 things and now, to be completely honest, I am not sure I want any of them.  I love, love but I don't think that everyone is meant to be with one person for the rest of their lives. I LOVE children, but not everyone is meant to have them.

3 Things I want now:

1. Live a life I LOVE
2. See the world
3. NEVER, ever let someone else make me feel like my choices are the wrong ones.


My wants have changed, a lot over the last little while and I think everyone's do. It is natural and I think it is why the whole "mid life crisis" is so common haha.

Anyways, I know I haven't written in awhile but this is where my minds been at!

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